Ghosting

I don’t forgive.
I don’t forget.
I’ll not tell you
but that’s how it is.
So if I’m gone
not around
if you’re wondering
what’s going down
maybe think
of that thing you said
or did
or didn’t do
because it’s not random
ghosting you.

Death Will Not Save You

It’s hard to get to,
but I can feel it…
the nugget is there
underneath the soiled laundry
and high fives
I didn’t think it would be so hard
to find it
what with everything that’s happening in the world.
It seems it should be more obvious…

But it isn’t.

If you stand with open arms
you will meet the sword
what other option is there
what other option is there

And maybe then, that’s the point
and the thing we don’t understand
maybe we’ve become so attached
to our condition
we’ve forgotten our own land.

But if I choose to open up
and then, my lord, I’m wrong
and my body goes away
and that’s all there ever was
in my dying breath
what horror does betray
as my eyes go dark
my regret will win the day
and maybe then
at the last second
I will finally feel some peace

Or maybe that’s the problem
with no solution’s ease
I want there to be peace
I want to feel the peace
there’s no such thing as peace
until death is at your feet
and then you’re done
your time is up
your balance sheet comes due
that is when you’ll understand
just who is leading who
and if you think that you feel sadness now
and confusion and remorse
if you think you suffer your sins now
just wait

Just wait, there’s more.

Try Now, To Feel It In Yourself

One of us is blind my friend
and maybe it is you.
One of us is blind my friend
who is leading who?
I have thought a lot
about the fact
that I cannot clearly see
and have come to the conclusion
that you
are not
right
with me.

And what other place could I arrive
if I am to be a human being
where else could I possibly settle
if not strong within myself
of course you’re not right with me
anything less is straight betrayal.

Everyone one of us picks sides
we all pick our favorite player.
We pick our favorite team
we love our favorite flavors.
We believe our own conclusions
We embrace our soulful truths
We travel round in circles
pointing out abuse
We’re like butterflies of poison
we know not what we do
but we fill our pouches
with righteous vengeance
and call it healing muse.

Do you remember your indignance
and how wonderful it feels
you’re so protected from your nature
you’re so wrapped up an un-confused.

Yes, yes, my child
I remember you
when you were so young
and before you were so well taught
that hatred has a home
and that it’s home is inside you
and there’s nothing you can do.

There is only one revolution possible
only one from which all others spring
Human life is not wide open like you think
Love is the only way
the rest is born of something else
Love is the only way
try now
to feel it in yourself.

Try now
to feel it
in yourself.

The Greatest Struggle

If you like insightful, raw, compassionate veiwpoints and you haven’t read Camille Paglia, you really need to check her out. I just saw a quote from her on The Twitter and it sums up as:

…evil is rooted in the human heart

This has been on my mind a lot lately and I’m grateful to people like Paglia and others who have really made it their life to seek and express their perspectives. These are not frivolous people, Paglia has paid a great cost to speak her truth and becuase she would do it all again doesn’t mean it hasn’t been painful, destrcutive or well earned. It’s important as our society and civilization continue to succumb to technology well beyond our morality and ethics that we find a way to decipher what is true and what is valuable.

Tomorrow it will essentially be possible to package and promote any perspective as truth. How can we know the difference? How can we know what is to be paid attention to?

Listen to those that have a lot to lose by what they say. That’s my method. If the person speaking or the entity promoting has nothing to lose or if they have a lot to gain (materially) by speaking, that is an indication to really question. If the person risks persecution, imprinsonment, alienation, hatred and violence to say what they have to say, maybe that’s worth a little more.

So back to the human heart and the roots of evil.

This is an answer among answers. It’s a foundational belief that can change and save and it is the opposite of what is being promoted in the mainstream right now. When I look around all I see are people pointing their fingers outwards, mad with conviction that if only this thing “out there” and that thing “out there” were different, the world would be a better place. People so convicted that they are blind to their own evil, the evil disguised as getting the job done, of doing good work, of making this right, of justice.

Evil is rooted in the human heart and nowhere else. To recognize this is to open up to the eternity of love and the wonder of life. To ignore or defy this is to forever be lost in constant battle of right and wrong but much worse…much worse than this, to defy the seed of evil inside your heart is to defy humanity itself, the great struggle of good and love. If you do not possess evil you cannot posses love.

Coach
Builder/Leader
Communicator

To be a good coach you need to be a strong leader
To be a strong leader you need to be able to communicate well

A Coach is someone who, in the deepest part of their heart, wants to help you do better and is willing to undertake whatever pain is necessary to discover and rediscover how to do this. A great coach will always look at your failure or success as part of them and will also be grinding their internal gears to get better themselves so they can better help you. A great coach compromises to uphold the greater vision but never as a shortcut. A great coach loves their players and gains inspiration for their own life through working with them. A great coach can separate themselves from their failures and successes and never wants success more than their players.

Lessons from Little League

Probably the biggest lesson I’ve learned from coaching 12u Little League is there are tremendous gifts right in front of you if you allow yourself to see them. For me, it took a while to see because I had been so focused, so well trained, so short sighted on assuming I knew what the gifts were.

Mail It In

Do you remember all those people you use to work with,
have fun with
get in trouble with
go crazy with
do really, really questionable shit with?

Do you remember those people?

Where are they now
and what are they doing?

Are they still doing questionable shit?
Or have they traded it in
for predictable shit?

Trust me, I get it.

But I think I let you down,
my friend.

I think I let you down.

I stopped expanding
and started settling
I think I let you down.

The world, it got me,
fangs deep in
it was always trying
it was bound to win
a questionable man once said

every time I try to get out
they suck me back in

Do you remember the fun
and now you have the justification
you’re older now
and more mature
you know exactly
what’s behind each door
because you don’t check
new doors
no more.

Yeah,
you don’t check new doors
no more.

Do you remember those friends
and the trouble you got in
and the way you didn’t give a fuck
and the way you looked at folks who did
as if they didn’t have no luck

Jesus mother fucking life

We gave up
We gave up
We gave up the fight
and our world rewarded us in the night
as it laughed and laughed
with sick deelight
it holds no quarter
and it wil not fight
if you want to mail it in
the world says
It’s all right
all right
all right
all right.

STRONG FIRE

The world is a vampire
sent to drink

Billy Corgan

25 years ago I was woken up by my fire
I built a wall around it
and there it burns
contained

42 years ago I was woken up by my fire
I built a wall around it
and there is burns
contained

Tonight I was woken up by my fire
I have a strong fire
I have a strong fire
I have a strong fire

It’s time to let it burn down the dead wood
It’s time to start new growth
If I had let it burn
so many years ago
I wouldn’t have to rage

But today, rage must happen before anything else

there is a chance it will get away from me

there is a chance it will get away from me

thank god there is a chance.

I’ve Had It Wrong All Along

You can’t out hypocrite a hypocrite
You can’t out coward a coward
You can’t out righteous the righteous

I see you.

If you say YES because you want to DO THINGS
You will say YES to anything you want
And not look for the consequences,
be they hidden
or right in front of your eyes.

Makes sense.

If you say YES because you say you want to be safe
You will say YES to anything that makes you feel safe
And justify any consequence
Based on your feeling of safety.

Makes sense.

If you say YES because you say the science matters
And you don’t take the same action
around Sugar
Alcohol
Cigarettes
Stress
Water
Pollution
Poverty
and on and on and on…
Then you are an obvious hypocrite

Makes sense.

If you say YES because you’re terrified and don’t know what to do
you are honest.

If you persecute others because they are not terrified and do know what to do
you are a tyrant.

If you say it’s a free world
and in a free world
people can make whatever choices they want
you are right.

If you think it’s necessary to have an authority that dictates the “Free World” you talk about…

Well…
You have what you want.
Enjoy.

Your Wonderful Thing

What is your Wonderful Thing?

Quiet now, maybe you’ve forgotten…

Take comfort,

forgetting only means you’ve been distracted.

You can return home

you’re Wonderful Thing has not forgotten you.

What is your Wonderful Thing?

Where does your heart play

and your mind, just rides along
where do you find your human song
and do you know it’s been there
all along

What makes your hand dance
and your problems grey…

Shapes In Fog

It’s hard to see
underneath…
to me

It’s hard to see
Around and between
it’s hard to see
life without me

And yet
here I am
walking and talking
like a man

It’s hard to see

But there’s something there
shapes in fog
and then gone again
and then re-appear
shapes in fog
there’s something there

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